
Get to know me
Hi, I’m Gav, also known as Tobey Alexander, a late-diagnosed autistic adult, multi-award-winning author, public speaker, certified life coach, and passionate advocate for neurodiversity. Diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Condition (ASC) and Combined ADHD (AuDHD), my journey has been one of self-discovery, resilience, and a relentless pursuit of authenticity. With nearly 20 years of experience in Blue Light Services, I’ve developed expertise across specialist roles in high-pressure and traumatic environments, honing leadership, adaptability, and problem-solving skills.
My Journey
For years, I hid behind a mask, striving to fit into a neurotypical world at the expense of my authenticity. My official autism diagnosis was a turning point, it empowered me to embrace my identity and unlock my potential. Alongside my BSc in Psychology from Nottingham Trent University and my professional qualifications (Level 3 Award in Education and Training (PTLLS) and TAQA), I am a certified life coach and currently working toward a qualification in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). In 2015, I released my first book, marking the start of my mission to showcase the unique strengths of being different and help others do the same.
Advocacy and Public Speaking
I am honoured to have been a guest speaker at major events, including those hosted by the East Midlands Special Operations Unit (EMSOU), Derbyshire Constabulary, Ministry of Defence, Civil Nuclear Constabulary, and Lincolnshire Police. My talks focus on promoting workplace inclusivity, education, and awareness by openly sharing my experiences as "an autistic in denial." Through these platforms, I aim to break down barriers, foster understanding, and inspire meaningful change.
Challenges and Triumphs
Between 2016 and 2019, my family and I faced life-changing challenges: my oldest son was hospitalised, my youngest son and I were both diagnosed with ASD, and my wife battled cancer. These experiences pushed me to reflect on what truly matters. During that period, my son, my dad, and I trekked to Everest Base Camp when my son was only thirteen. That journey led to the creation of our family mantra, “You Are Your Only Limit,” which became a guiding principle for me and inspired a trilogy of books to help my son navigate his diagnosis and my family through cancer treatments.
Creativity and Purpose
My neurodivergent mind channels creativity into writing books and screenplays that explore themes of identity, resilience, and embracing differences. My stories push beyond conventional genres and reflect the complexities of living as a neurodivergent individual. Despite working within the constraints of self-publishing, my passion has earned nearly 30 awards for my screenplays. I believe storytelling is one of the most powerful ways to inspire future generations and help others shed their masks long before I did.
Vision and Aspiration
My mission is to support neurodivergent individuals and future generations, helping them step away from the pressure to mask or conform. By providing tailored resources, coaching, and lived experiences, I help others break through internal and societal barriers. My long-term vision is to help create a world where neurodivergent strengths are recognised, valued, and celebrated as essential to collective success.
Join Me
I am proud of who I am and vocal about my role in the neurodiversity revolution. Through my books, public speaking engagements, coaching, and advocacy, I aim to help build a more inclusive and understanding world. Join me on this mission by exploring my work, attending my talks, and supporting the movement to embrace diversity and authenticity.
My Aims
Empowering Individuals: Coaching and guiding neurodivergent people to embrace their strengths, build confidence, and achieve personal and professional growth.
Inspiring Through Storytelling: Sharing creative works that explore resilience, identity, and the power of being different to inspire future generations.
Advocating for Change: Raising awareness, challenging societal norms, and driving the creation of inclusive environments where neurodivergent talents thrive.
Let’s work together to redefine success and celebrate what makes us unique.